Info
Hopefully I managed to get this released before christmas-
By Praetor3005 (author page)
Special thanks to:
Nikuchan for answering my many Philia questions
Mel-Raspberry for helping with Nyx
Stixiiee,
LiminalDoctor,
KillerOreo52
matthewschaos and
DivineAtlas for reviewing the page in record time
CamaradeAlbabar for being such a great hater
LaundryFan_04 for making the Cella render in such a short amount of time
After centuries of silence, the soft patter of footsteps began to echo within the once bustling temple.
As Nyx expected from the exterior view, the corridor was a circular pathway going all around the temple. Its architecture, however, was unlike anything they'd seen in person so far. While most of the dimensions they visited were simple-looking, ranging from industrial sections to bland resting places, the interiors of Hoofish buildings were far more detailed.
Looking all around, they discerned elegant pillars supporting complex marble patterns on the ceilings, with a mosaic floor seemingly going all around the round building. Even the few empty rooms on their path were decorated with elegant heart-like patterns, making the former purpose of the structure clear.
Amazement struck the alien as they kept looking around, noticing more and more elegant details on their way. Anthony had assured Nyx that all the buildings in Hoofstad had been built by humans, yet their craft surpassed everything the Backrooms procedurally generated for them. The mere thought that human creativity could surpass that of the world itself was enticing, proving to the alien that they still had much to learn about this species.
Architectural feats weren't the reason they came here, however, and the contents of the art decorating the hallway constantly reminded Nyx of what led them to come to Hoofstad in secret.
Whether it was the mosaics on the floor, the paintings on the walls, or the statues near the pillars, all depicted the same recurring character: a tall, slim woman of incredible beauty. The only obscuring feature covering her naked form was soft, pink hair which formed a gentle curl as it rested gently on her shoulders. Her presence was everywhere, sometimes accompanied by a cloaked figure on her side, sometimes surrounded by people Nyx thought to be her followers.
Nyx approached one of the paintings on the wall. The pink-haired lady stood at its center, the only thing hiding her naked body being the long dark cloak put on in front of her by the same tall hooded man they had witnessed a few times here already. Just like every other depictions, her apparent humanity clashed with the eldritch nature of the being as it was known today.
Nyx chuckled at the sight of the barely clothed nymph, thinking of how awkward Anthony would act if he was alongside her. He really didn't change one bit since the alien met them, feeling uneasiness from the smallest things.
Their smile quickly faded, however, as they felt the distance between them and their historian friend more than ever. Thinking about anything else was next to impossible, with everything around Nyx reminding them of the historian's passion.
Nyx had seen similar paintings in the past, with Anthony having rambled about their cultural significations during the many late nights spent together. The woman's naked status symbolized innocence and purity, while her partner on the left protected her, metaphorically and physically, from the world all around. The historian talked extensively about the relationship between the two; the painting, just like many other representations, depicting them as lovers.
Whatever it meant.
Nyx remembered asking him about the nature of the depicted relationship but was only met with incoherent gibbering, a rather rare sight coming from the passionate historian. The topic obviously made him uneasy, but Nyx had never thought about it too hard.
Until recently.
Since they joined Team Hermes, the alien had always been closer to Anthony than to any other human there. Despite their different backgrounds, the two had found a common ground in their deep willingness to transmit the knowledge they held to a listening ear, one that they found in each other.
The Styxian engineer enjoyed the historical ramblings of the historian just as much as he enjoyed the astrophysical explanations they gave to him. Despite their different cultures, the two nonetheless always managed to communicate, gradually getting to understand each other better.
Nyx wasn't naive. They knew their bond with the historian was special. Yet, even after the time spent together in their home, none of them had been able to properly put words on this relationship, whatever the reason was.
The search for such knowledge was the reason for their visit. Despite Styxians being familiar with the concept of close bonds, the way humans seemed to work made their expectations useless. Katya, Charlie, and even that Spec guy hinted at something greater between the two, but even after all these years trying to understand human emotions, what they were feeling remained an ethereal concept.
Perhaps the worst part of it, however, was what it implied for the alien: the growing dread that being cut from their hive mind broke their own. The fear that they were now a defect, close to humans, yet unable to fully relate to them.
Nyx left the painting and bifurcated in the inner section of the temple, hoping the walk would distract them from the negative thoughts. Yet again, the alien was greeted by a representation of the same being, further proof of the devotion of those who used to live here.
Nyx's only hope was that these people had figured out something that would work for them. Human books, human discussions—none had been able to put words onto the feeling she could understand. However, just like the alien, this deity wasn't human. They were a pure, unfathomable representation of the same emotion they sought to understand.
One eldritch being to another, Nyx held the hope that her teachings remained somewhere in the priests' former practice rooms. Followers of the old faith were few nowadays, but Charlie assured her the Lost had a proximity with the goddess that had been lost to time.
And there was no reason to not believe a firm believer like him.
As they kept looking over the few rooms around the corridor, Nyx was suddenly greeted by a faint moonlight coming from the door on their right. The alien instinctively took a step backward. Hoofstad has been engulfed in a cave for centuries. Wherever this light came from, this was no normal phenomenon.
Yet the light felt gentle, almost inviting, with no sound or scent accompanying it. Nyx took a deep breath. Few things in this world could harm, let alone kill them, and leaving would mean having made all this progress for nothing. Whatever it was, it could be their chance.
With curiosity overriding their uneasiness, Nyx passed through the threshold.
The room they stepped in was immense, far bigger than the corridors they were in just a second ago. Marble slabs composed most of the floor, alternating in circles with more mosaics, this time depicting rituals and symbols unknown to the alien. At the center of everything was a gilded altar, with the open ceiling overlooking the middle of the room, breaking the otherwise lackluster nature of the furnishings.
Then Nyx saw her, appearing from behind one of the pillars. The same tall, pink-haired woman she saw represented in the earlier corridors, wearing a white, elegant dress with gilded jewelry all over.
The alien gasped at the sight of a being they thought to be long gone, but her look was what unsettled them the most. For an eldritch being, a living personification of a natural concept, they looked unfathomably human, close if not similar to the depictions Nyx thought to be romanticized depictions of the deity.
Doubt started to emerge. She was an ethereal figure, but her nature was deeply tied to humans. This species was the one who created her and looked for her guidance. Like all the beings of the Lost's religion, her nature and purpose remained directed toward their species.
Could a human god really help them? Could their teachings really apply to them?
Despite their uncertainty, Nyx felt a peaceful aura emanating from the figure. One of trust, care, and gentleness. Her eyes felt like endless care, strengthened by the kind, honest smile of a being who truly cared for those who looked for her. Feeling compelled by the presence, the alien slowly walked toward her without a word.
The being was the first to break the silence, the soft breeze of her caring tone only adding to her calm appearance.
I am honored to see you here, my child. Your identity is a mystery to me, yet I sense a familiar energy coming from you. Please, tell me how I can help you today, dear.
It's you… Nyx stuttered at the sight of a being they had for so long relegated to a name from Anthony's teachings. Philia, is it not? I have come to seek your help.
As Nyx kept walking closer, the goddess approached the alien, both meeting close to the gilded altar.
You are a curious one. Not human, but still not a native of this realm. I am as unfamiliar with you as you are with me, yet we share similarities within ourselves. Who are you, dear?
Nyx shuddered, realizing she had taken the same size as them, as if they were speaking from equal to equal.
My name is Nyxtlr’a, though my friends call me Nyx. I entered in this reality by accident, and I'm now cut off from the collective consciousness of my people, they recollected. It's been a few years now, and I started to understand humans better. Yet there are some complex feelings I hold towards a specific one, but I don't understand them, let alone know if he feels the same.
The goddess didn't respond, inviting the alien to continue their story.
I was told you were the embodiment of human love, one born from the way humans experienced these close bonds. Out of everyone, you must be the one who would understand them best. I need help understanding these feelings they call love and figuring out what is wrong with me.
Philia smiled in return, her eyes sparking with a newfound interest.
Ah, Nyx… You remind me of how I used to be. Clueless of their world, yet so eager to understand them, to be a part of them. I relate to you, perhaps more than anyone.
Nyx wrinkled their eyes, confused. You are a manifestation of human love, created by them, guiding them across ages. How come you struggled understanding it?
The goddess started walking around, slowly going around the room, quickly followed by the alien.
Being born from pure love is one thing, but understanding how it manifests is another. Love is a complex feeling, even for humans. There is what it is and how people feel it. I knew who I was, but like with your feelings, understanding the deeper part of myself was more complicated than putting words onto a definition.
Her last sentence ironically felt more like a taunt to the astrophysicist. The world is to be understood. I studied physics for years, I worked in spatial engineering, I created space travel for my own people. How can feelings be so complicated to me? How can my—and his—emotions be so confusing, even after all these years?
The lady stopped, taking a step on her left to reveal a mosaic on the floor, depicting a winged heart above two men holding each other's hands. That's because you are looking at this feeling as if it was logical; cold, and unchanging. Yet, love is warm and bright. It is not a fact but an experience. No book, no class will teach you how to understand it. It is an emotion made out of experiences to decrypt alone.
The temperature dropped as the moonlight became brighter. What I can do, however, is share with you who I was, and how I dealt with what you are trying to understand. We used to share our own ignorance, after all. An eldritch being to another, one memory to help another.
The warmth, the building, and even the cave above were gone, replaced by a vast expanse of hills and rivers, all below the dawn sky of an era long gone.
I took interest in them as soon as they started entering this reality. Phila told the alien as ghosts of people in togas went past the two, carrying bags and farm animals. Out of all the sapient beings native to this world, it was the aliens who appealed to me. The foreigners. People who didn't define me, yet who I felt deeply close to.
The image of a woman came close to Nyx and the goddess without noticing them. She carried her newborn, wrapped up in layers of yarn fabric. Her face looked filthy, worried, yet determined. Another man of her age quickly rushed by her side to help her walk, traversing Nyx as if they were a phantasmal image in their way.
They had this aura of care. This relentless need to be with specific people: the one who birthed them, the ones who supported them, and the ones they birthed themselves. I came to learn the word they used to describe these close groups: family. It was more than people joining hands to form a community; it was something deeper, something I felt for each of them, yet something I did not understand yet.
I remember such things. Nyx whispered. I was a part of a lineage, like anyone else. I had someone who created me; I had people created alongside me.
The alien sighed. I miss them. We were created with different purposes, yet their voice echoing within my mind is something I have deeply missed since I was cut from their thought.
Philia put her hand on Nyx's shoulder. You people had much closer concepts of love than you probably realize. The fact that you mourn their absence is proof of how much you cared for them.
Anthony told me about their birthers as well, the alien recollected. He had two, apparently. I never understood how it worked, really. He told me he never knew them, so I never asked them again. It seemed to hurt him just as much as it did for me. But this isn't the same, is it? Is that relevant to human love?
In a sense, these feelings are linked, Philia explained. Love for the ones who created you, love from the ones you create—these are invaluable feelings for constructing oneself. Yet, at the center of it, lies a special someone, a form of love different than all others. That's something I struggled to understand for a long time.
Philia pointed at the two people who just passed by. The man is called Canaan. He is a carpenter who lost his parents when he was only five. He met the woman, Isis, two years ago at the time. Their child, Achaikos, is the result of the bond they share now.
Nyx bent an eyebrow. So… Human love is a man and a woman making an offspring together? The way their species manage to replicate and survive? That doesn't sound very efficient. What does it have to do with being close? And how does it tie to me, someone who doesn't have this way of reproducing?
Philia giggled playfully. You truly are just like I was at the time, seeing the physical as a conclusion of the emotional. Just like me, your species doesn't birth through love, so the idea of a dual passion is alien to you. The goddess' expression morphed into regret.
Did you ever get to experience family? Nyx asked the being, trying to sound as caring as she had been with them so far.
Alas, this part of love is something my existence had stopped me from ever feeling. She answered, saddened.
So are we doomed to be alone and confused forever? Isn't human love supposed to be more than just creating a flesh copy of ourselves? Nyx added, still confused.
The goddess' face went from cold to warm in an instant, a smile of a proud mother forming back. You're starting to understand. She nodded before pointing at another couple further away. These two lovebirds are Hieronymus and Menander. Cruel nature has not permitted them to create life together, yet their relation remains as real as the couple we met earlier.
So the birth is a part of love, but only one feature. Nyx started to count on their hands. That doesn't help me, does it? Just a second ago, I thought you told me the purpose of love, but now it feels like it's multifaceted, and that I have only seen a side that I can't even use. The alien looked back at Philia. How is it linked to this warm embrace I feel every time I see him? Why are you telling all of this?
To open your mind and widen your understanding of them. She calmly responded. Just like you, the first thing I understood about human love was the part of it I would never get to experience. I thought I was an imperfect deity, a broken representation of an aspect of mankind this reality failed to replicate. And then I met him.
The landscape blurred again, and both now stood in a lake, bathed in moonlight. A few meters away was a similar-looking woman with the same cloaked man Nyx saw in the representations earlier.
After so much time watching humanity, I thought my purpose was an impossible task to accomplish. I saw all that I could not experience and felt like love was the furthest thing from myself I could ever imagine. Just like you, I once felt the regret of something I would never fully understand.
Philia and Nyx approach the ethereal duo. And then I met him, the one humans now call Argos. He, like me, embodied a purpose he did not understand. One of order and justice. He, too, was born from human concepts, yet was unable to grasp them. In our pain, we found each other, and we supported each other.
Anthony and I also feel like we're cut away from everyone else… But we have each other to show our passions to. That's why we're so close.
So love is about being similar? The alien asked the deity, to which Philia smiled.
That would be a part of it indeed, but the truth is that the origin of love is different for everyone. You, however, seem to find my own relatable, so let me tell you more.
Philia and Nyx followed the two ghosts as they kept walking around the lake.
I was named Agape, at the time. I was a different being, yet my feelings were the same. We were lost, but in each other, we found purpose. Slowly, we built each other up together. We were nothing apart, but every time we met, it felt like we were two puzzle pieces finally reunited. We were an ever-growing whole, a living perfection. It was a perfect paradise. A unique feeling.
Nyx found themselve blushing at the explanation, the time spent with Anthony feeling eerily close to what the goddess explained. We were lost, outcasts within this strange reality. Together, we found purpose, and we helped each other. It was more than coworkers, more than what I felt with Katya and Charlie. He was my favorite human.
Philia turned back to face Nyx. And he still is, isn't he?
I guess… The alien added. But what tells me he feels the same? What tells me the way I feel it is the way he feels it? How can humans find something that complex so natural to them? And why do I feel it as well?
Take a deep breath, my dear. Philia calmed Nyx. Confusion is a normal part of love as you start realizing you might hold these feelings.
And what do I do with it? The alien retorted as the landscape morphed yet again.
The duo was now back in the temple's Cella, although the entire structure was this time under construction, with scaffolding all around. For the first time, Nyx saw the daylight of Hoofstad's dual suns as it was more than two thousand years ago.
Just like they did. Philia responded gently. You live, you learn, and you discover.
The time all around sped up. With the construction ending in mere seconds, faithful humans started to come in, one by one, talking with a phantasmal image of the goddess not too far from the real one.
Each of them was like you at one point, you know. Love isn't something they understood directly either. While it first felt ironic that they sought guidance from me out of everyone, I came to understand that the experiences that I went through defined me as… human, in some way.
Philia turned back to Nyx, who was looking around at the speeding scenes, trying to grasp everything. You have been listening to me for a while now, as I recollected the search for my own humanity. But now, I think you're ready to formulate what you truly need. Speak, Nyx.
But I'm not human… I will never be! They yelled, the information now overwhelming their mind. You were created by them; you had a chance to understand and to form bonds with them, but I won't, I can't! I'm a broken fragment of a hive mind; I cannot feel like them, I cannot love like them. I'm just a cog in a machine that got lost in the way!
The alien fell down to the floor. How can you talk of me as if I had the ability to find that purpose when I wasn't even conceived to change paths? How can you pretend that I… I…
The alien failed to finish their sentence, staying in silence as Philia joined the alien down on the floor.
How can I know these feelings are genuine when none of my species is supposed to have them? Nyx sighed. How do I know I'm not just mimicking humans because I have nothing else to do? How can I know these feelings, as real as they are, are genuine? What tells me I'm not just a freak of nature away from their home? They concluded, talking to themselves more than to the deity.
Philia skimmed the alien's head, empathetic. Well, it's not hurting anyone, is it?
How is that relevant? The alien confusedly asked, to which Philia stood up, carrying Nyx with her. The two walked closer to the altar, where her past self stood with two men, now slowed down enough for the duo to hear them.
Remember when I showed you a couple earlier, telling you nature didn't let them have children, yet their love was just as real?
The alien nodded, unsure of where the deity was getting to.
Many people in the early years of this city have used nature as an excuse to hate the love they didn't feel. They looked over a species that cut itself from the primordial order and decided that what they couldn't understand was a threat to their existence.
They saw two men together who made each other's day brighter by simply being there, and they hated it. Yet these two didn't hurt anyone, did they?
I guess not, but how is that relevant? The alien insisted.
If it's not harming you, or anyone else for that matter, why torture yourself with what nature intended or not? Your love is real and valid. Don't end up like these hateful people, fighting against yourself, brewing your own struggles. Seek peace in yourself through acceptance.
It is harming me, though. Nyx sighed. I don't know how I can fully accept something that none of my species ever had to be confronted with. I understand that there is no logical reason for me to fear it, yet… It's about the Hive Mind. If being cut away from it makes me able to feel this love, wouldn't that mean there was a good reason for the lock to be there to begin with?
Philia tried to object, but Nyx continued. What if love is dangerous for my species? What if I end up hurting Anthony in some way? There must be a reason why evolution gave us this, right?
The goddess took a reassuring stance. You have a mindset of logic, but fear is twisting it to your detriment. Remember what I told you about overthinking? Such thoughts are harming you more than the possibility that it could be true. I will not pretend to know your species or how your brain is supposed to work. But it doesn't matter to know if it's supposed to happen. I see it happening, and that's what's important.
That's how I eventually understood it myself. She continued. It's strange to be a being who shouldn't have their brain produce any of these emotional chemicals, yet feeling love anyway. But this isn't something to fear. Life is the search for happiness. If your struggles made your love dangerous, trust me, you would have realized it by now. There's no need to fear consequences that have yet to even show things of potentially happening.
It's hard to convince myself of it, though. Nyx frowned. I understand your experience, and I'm sure it can apply to me, but it's hard to accept it. I still hold this eventuality on the back of my mind that gives me shivers every time I think about it, no matter how much I try to dismiss it. It's still holding me back even if I wouldn't want to.
The deity contemplated the people around, inviting the alien to do the same. My speech won't immediately make you feel better, nor should it. Just like with everyone else here, it will take time and work from you to figure things out.
Still looking at her followers, she kept on talking. However, you don't have to do it by yourself. What makes love truly special is that it goes beyond yourself. It is a shared bond where each helps the other. Love is mutual, after all. You and Anthony may struggle with your feelings, but you will support each other through the voyage.
But what if he doesn't want to? I'm still not quite human. Why would he pick me and not someone easier to work with? Nyx questioned the goddess, still worried.
Philia smiled before uttering only three words:
Did he yet?
The alien didn't respond, pondering with themselves. They remembered the journey and the many struggles they went through together. They remembered the joy of finding him after a hard day, the interest he gave to their own research, the hand trust he put in her even during the end of the world, the hard times they spent together when the future felt blurry. They remembered the obstacles and how, with each passing day, their bond made each other grow better and brighter than the day before. They remembered the feeling and how genuine they were.
Do you feel the embrace, dear? Philia gently asked the alien.
I do, Nyx conceded, staring into nothing. He chose me, and I chose him, whatever the reason was. He helped me just as much as I helped him. I guess it's reasonable to assume he would still want to. They sighed. I just wish it was easier…
We all went through this. Philia empathetically reiterated. Your species may be unique, but this doesn't doom your future, far from it. If you're a being of facts and logic, then use your time spent together as a way to reinforce your love, not question it. Overthinking about nature or intentions is natural, and you will never truly stop such thoughts. It is only with time that you will understand how to separate genuine worry from purposeless fear. I know you can do it, just like I had been able to do it in the past. Have faith in your love, and you two will succeed.
You know, you feel surprisingly human for someone I always thought to be so different from them, Nyx pondered as they looked around. I didn't think we'd have had such similar experiences. Anthony would like you, I think. You're a caring figure.
I have yet to learn about your cherished soul, dear. Please, tell me more about him as I show you around. She offered the alien, with the smile of a being with something on the back of her mind.
As the two started to walk back to the inner layer, Nyx tried to put words on their memories:
Where do I even start? He's the kindest human I've ever seen down here. The alien told Philia. Even if he struggles with human interactions himself, he always tries to help me fit in Team Hermes. He told me about their culture, their history…
The duo kept walking through the temple, leaving the private quarters of the priests to enter the outer layer, full of people discussing, observing the art depictions around, or making short prayers toward the statues.
These people… Their way of life is Anthony's passion. I find it interesting as well, but according to him, I am one of the only people in Hermes who actually listen to it. You can feel the interest when he discusses it. He's always so happy to transmit such knowledge. He's not usually talkative, but he really does his best with me. I'm actively looking for it, after all.
It must be good for him to have a listening ear indeed. Philia smiled, unbothered.
Oh, he's equally as curious as well. Nyx bounced back. Astrophysics and Styxian engineering may not be something he understands very well, but he enjoys when I discuss them. Or at least I think he does… They concluded, unsure.
Don't overthink it, dear. Philia reassured the alien. You two have different passions, but your care toward each other can make anything intriguing. You said you liked to hear him talk, didn't you? It's the same thing for him.
You really have the answer to everything. Nyx smiled in return. I guess experience helps.
You're not the only one to think about it too hard. The deity added. Each person in this corridor came in here for a reason. They seek advice, answers to their own doubt. They wish to know what to do to please their loved one or help in shutting down the fear that their feelings might not be mutual.
Philia stopped near a statue of her for a moment, glancing at the woman below whispering with her eyes closed. I gave each of them reassurance. The needed strength to make the next move or put the dread aside.
I wish I could read Anthony's mind. Nyx sighed. It was so much easier back on my home world. My lineage shared a common mind, but without it, it's hard to know how the other is thinking. How can I know what to do without the knowledge?
Philia chuckled. Ah, if you knew how many humans wished for the same thing. Eventually, you will start understanding the small things that make your relationship so obvious to the others all around you.
How are the small things relevant? Nyx wondered, back to their confused self. Wouldn't the big proofs matter more than the details?
The alien turned to face the goddess, who was smirking as if she expected this exact reaction. She didn't answer directly, instead walking to the temple's entrance, followed closely by Nyx.
Immediately, the light of the exterior blinded the alien, unused to natural light. As their eyes started to adapt, they discerned the many trees, bushes, and flowers forming the outer garden. The place was in much better shape than the one from present times, basking in Hoofstad's former dual suns.
The entire garden felt ethereal, a completely different experience from the withered plantations they had seen a few hours ago. As they looked around, Nyx saw couples lounging below the pine trees, holding each other's hands. Others were walking around, discussing, sometimes arguing with each other.
While you are right that relationships are defined by the bigger and more obvious traits, the smaller things also play a big role in them. Philia started as she invited the alien to come outside with her. Love isn't always portrayed so obviously. It's about the little gestures, one taking the chores of the exhausted other, one offering a small gift the other wanted for so long. Love is about mistakes too, fighting then making up, fumbling in your own words or gestures…
I would never fight Anthony! Nyx rose up. I don't want to hurt him! He already struggles enough, I- I- I wouldn't- I don't want to harm him. Nyx started breathing more heavily. I already feel bad enough that our first interaction traumatized him from the exterior world for so long…
The alien looked down, reminded of the events of their encounter in 523-FR. Despite the fact that Nyx and Team Hermes couldn't understand each other at the time, they still felt intensely terrible about giving Anthony such a panic attack, as they felt threatened by the operatives. Even after all these years, Nyx feared their superior physical nature would end up hurting the historian in one way or another.
I fear confrontation would scare or hurt him. We're not even from the same species; how could I not be anxious about this? And that's not even accounting for the psychological pain I could cause! I saw the sorrow when he mentioned his parents last time. I don't want this to happen again. What if he hates me because of that? What makes him leave me?
As Nyx kept shaking, Philia took their head between their hands, raising it towards her. Don't fear the struggle, dear. Mistakes are just as much of a part of love as they are a part of life. You live and learn, and over time, you will understand yourself and your relationship better. Without mistakes, there is no betterment. Struggles are here to show you how deep your relation is.
The goddess pointed to a couple in the distance, who looked like they were yelling at each other. Look at these two, arguing over something as meaningless as the color of their house curtains. Yet in a few hours, they will come back to their senses, apologizing to each other and making sure this never happens again.
Turning back to Nyx, she continued: It is okay to make mistakes. None of us are perfect. If you mean no harm, if both of you want what's best, you will overcome any fight, any meaningless argument. Every word you came to regret later on.
So Anthony doesn't hate me for reminding him he was abandoned as a child? Nyx asked the being, who smiled in return.
I'm sure he doesn't. But if this torments you so much, ask him when you come back. Being honest and open is important in a relationship, after all.
Nyx didn't immediately respond, meditating on the goddess' words. Human love definitely felt confusing—imperfect, yet so idyllic. For the first time in years, Nyx felt purpose in their relationship, as if the mistakes, the fears, and everything that had been holding them for so long were now only a set of obstacles to overcome.
You get it now, don't you? Philia asked the alien with the pride of a mother towards her child.
Love is a voyage. Nyx whispered. A nonexistent perfection that we nonetheless need to seek to take on its full meaning.
The alien looked around, watching the many couples wandering around the blissful garden. Just like me and Anthony, they struggled to understand their own feelings at some point, but with time, they built a relationship of care and happiness. They completed each other. That's what it is about, isn't it?
It fills me with joy to see how far your understanding has come so quickly. The goddess shed a tear.
You truly are a blessing. Nyx smiled in return. It is a shame this place has withered away, that everyone left. With your kindness, you deserve all the followers in the world.
Philia's smile left as quickly as it had appeared. She looked aimlessly towards the sky, the vision around them slightly losing its vibrant colors. A shame indeed… She whispered back, almost stuttering.
Nyx put their hand on her shoulder, compassionate. Do you want to talk about it? They asked the goddess.
Love is a powerful feeling. Philia slowly responded. But with the joy it gives, losing the one you cared about can break you more than anyone can think.
The goddess kept looking at the sky. There was once a woman, a proud, zealous warrior, one who found purpose in her family. But one day, in the blink of an eye, the mistake of one of my kin destroyed everything she ever had.
The images of the people around vanished. Plants withered away and buildings eroded themselves as she kept talking. The sky darkened slowly until all that was left was the stone ceiling of the present-day level.
Even vengeance didn't bring her peace. She was broken, but despite the help of the last person she had in her life, she never managed to move on. In her eternal grief, in her broken love, she doomed all she had left. In her ultimate attempt to finish what she had started, she destroyed what was left of this world.
It was clear to the alien the goddess was mentioning the thing humans called death. Despite all the years they spent alongside them, Nyx still didn't grasp the idea of the end of existence itself. They found it illogical, paradoxical even. While they never insisted on learning about the specific, they knew the woman in question struggled to process never talking to their family again, a feeling that Nyx would this time understand. As ethereal as Philia was, it seemed this had led to the loss of everything she ever cared for.
I'm sorry. Nyx whispered, hugging the deity. I understand how it feels to have everything you had be gone in the blink of an eye, lost due to something you couldn't control.
Your kind words mean a lot. Philia smiled back. The past is still a wound I will carry forever, but this never stopped my love for the people who live in this reality. With recent events shaking the status quo once more, perhaps the future will get brighter.
I believe in you just as much as you believe in me. Nyx assured the deity. I'm sure it will get better.
Thanks a lot, Nyx. Philia took a step away from the alien. I am sorry I brought this up right now. I don't want to leave you in such a mood. Will you two be okay?
The alien smiled. I think we can figure the rest out now. Thanks to you, I think I got to understand myself a little more, and I don't know how I'll ever be able to repay you.
The satisfaction of knowing you two will live a lovely life together is all I need. But who knows, perhaps our paths will cross once more in the future.
Farewell, Nyxtlr’a. May your future be bright. The goddess concluded as she faded into nothingness, leaving the alien in front of the deserted temple.
This time, the wilted plants and broken stone brick did nothing to break Nyx's spirit. They smiled again, thinking of the future.
Perhaps they could learn to be human, after all.
